I have settled into a routine – prayer, meditation. reading and writing. But ….
My pen has run out of ink and my Kindle is out of power. So, in freedom, I can change my day round. I have a meeting tonight so I am going to relax a little this morning, do some other things that need doing, and start again with Prayer During the Day.
Last night, before going to sleep, it dawned on me that I had not thought about my death for the whole time here. I mean, wanting the pain to end. I feel settled and, for the first time in a very long time, balanced. I still have one foot in the world (especially in trying to close some past chapters) but I like having time to pray and meditate. And I have slept much better!
On meditating: it gets harder with time! Even in the nothingness of my life there is lots to plan and organise. So silence of mind is very hard for me at the moment. Maybe it has always been hard because I have lived my life in my head rather than my heart? But my heart has always been stronger and so there is no balance.
Heart of Jesus, I trust in you!